Pics are of my scrumdiddlyocius breakfast, my favorite plant to walk naked in (for some reason I end up itchy afterwards), and Public Enemy # 1 attempting to avoid her likeness being captured.
Little Jonida came to work with me today, as planned. I snuck her in my briefcase with a bottle of onion soup and a can of Ostrich Idus. After double-checking to make sure the coast was clear, I closed the door and turned on my computer and let little Jonida type away. It’s frightening how many great story ideas she has. As those of you who have seen the documentary probably noticed, we pride ourselves in employing talking animals. Which is why I am suddenly struck with just how perverted owning a dog is in the world of talking animals.
Did any of you read the books or watch the cartoon of Arthur? He was an aardvark whose best friend was a rabbit. He hung out with two monkeys and a bear/bulldog thing and... he owned a dog. Is that not sick and twisted? I’m beginning to question my own morality here.
I was also ambushed while exiting the office yet again today. Little Jonida was traumatized by my screams as I was pelted by not only eggs, but also tomatoes. I’m beginning to think that the children I met at the park yesterday were also savage heathen guinea pigs sent to ambush me, which would be why they threw the rock.
In this state of deep self-reflection I have decided that this shall be my penultimate blog entry. That’s right, my minions - Moe Jacuzzi is going to be disappearing from the web. I can’t say for sure when I’ll be back, especially since I’ll be spending most of the rest of my time counseling little Jonida after her recent trauma, but there is always the possibility of my return. For now, however, it is time for you to leave me your parting words, comments and questions. I’ll post for my final time tomorrow.
On that dismal note, I’ll check the mail –
PG15 writes: “Moe, would you like me to rub your feet for hours at a time? I request nothing in return, as I will be by your side. Or even better, I would be beneath you, which is exactly how fans should feel...globviously.”
Answer: Oh my faithful minion, how I shall miss your incessant groveling. But for the time being I must ask you be patient my humble servant, and await in the shadows as the Death Eaters awaited the return of the Dark Lord.
Kirfect writes: “Is there anyway that you can have Carter say. "Dude we should whack this guy" sometime soon?
Also is there any pie left”
Answer: Whack who? That is not a subtley-veiled fandom reference to hiring a hit man to kill me, is it? And gods no – that piece of pie that I photographed was one I specifically cut out and set aside for the picture while I devoured the rest with my hands.
Jen Kirk writes: “You may not find it funny Moe, but I gotta say the fact that you have bitching directed towards YOU is truely hilarious”
Answer: Finally – a fan who truly understands my invaluable worth. I created this blog for praise, not complaints. Nor a source of negativity. I don’t see why so many of you got upset over my guinea pig comment. Guinea pigs are cute – fat, scurrying, and squeaky.
SallyWallyWee writes: “Oh Moe I wuv u so mush I no everyone is naked under thier cloths but Sam & Jack R saving themselfs for special cuddles after thier marriage which we can play out in my Princess Barbie tent in yur garden.
Mom & Apple Pye says shes kept a glory box for me since i woz born so its perfect for uz to set up houze in the Princess Barbie tent 2gether.
Mom & Apple Pye wantz uz 2 set up the Princess Barbie tent in her garden coz u need to beehav yurself
We can have a doble wedding wit my Elisbef & Shep dollz.”
Answer: Whoa whoa whoa... when I responded to your previous comments I didn’t mean to give the impression that I was in any way interested in you, little girl. And who the hell are Mom and Apple Pye?
Anonymous # 1 writes: “Now, your doggies are so adorable!”
Answer: Why thank you. I certainly think so. Did you enjoy today’s little Jonida story?
Northern Red writes: “Will John confess his undying love for
Answer: She was exploded, not axed. There were no axes involved, aside from that shard of metal stuck in Ronon which no one made the offer to pull out because we didn’t want his teammates caring about his life to seem shippy in any way. Though I don’t discuss ships.
DownWithSheyla writes: “Moe, Who do you thinks is prettier
Answer: ....Ah yes. I see you’re one of the Weir/Jacuzzi, Teyla/Jacuzzi shippers. It’s flattering, really, though I don’t discuss ships.
TeylaIsYucky writes: “Moe, If you guys make Sheyla cannon I will no longer watch your show, oh wait a minute, I thinks I've already made that threat a million time already. Let me see I need something new to threaten you with. You know I'm really going to have to give this alot of thought, so I'm going go back to GW, talk to the rest of my Sparky friends and come up with some new threats.”
Answer: ...You’re not an egg-wielder, are you?